In your 30’s, 40’s and even 50’s and feel the need to dress like a street kid rolling to your first petty crime scene? We have just the shit for you then, recreate that feeling of dressing with a ‘Fuck you’ attitude with this stunningly simple gear, black clearly de rigueur and hides the blood mud well.

If you like the look and want to get involved, then hit me here and our mega low tech logistics process will slowly grind into gear to get something to you… eventually.

The Dirty Hoodie


An instant classic

Not so practical for the tropics, but ideal for heading to its natural habitat – The bike park, assuming its not the middle of summer, then you’re fucked. Also handy for flying on freezing cold planes. Sizing is generous, if in doubt hit this link:

Scope out my dirty hoodie 

Colour – BLACK

The Dirty T

Perfect for burglaries

Perfect for burglaries

Been working out? Then go a size down and flex your shit in these high quality T’s. Everyone wants a black one, so that’s how the fuck we roll. If you beg, maybe we can do another colour… Like very very very dark grey.

Hit me for the T Shirt low down

We do a chicks T shirt on request, assume if you’re ordering one of these you either want to pull or break up, depending on your circumstance. Dirty T’s work well in either scenario. Oh, here’s a sizing chart:

T shirt sizing chart

Get my head Dirty


Fuck you helmet hair

Not that Road bike friendly, but the way to go after a day of shredding and you want to hide that helmet hair while you’re kicking it (i.e. uploading to Strava like a fiend). Its the classic flexi fit action, but if you need to check it out, then hit this for the low down on the caps.

This is the best way to use your dirty kit once acquired, so get busy:


The T Shirt made me do it…